How Mercy Begins with Love
Go to a quiet place where you can be alone and undisturbed for at least half an hour. Remove everything from your hands and get comfortable. Take some deep, slow breaths for a few moments as you listen to peaceful instrumental music that helps you feel relaxed and at peace.
Begin by asking God to help you surrender all distractions.
Lord, I give you every worry and fear now. I give you my aches and pains — both physical and emotional. I consecrate this time to You.
Then, join me in this conversation with God about mercy. Below, you'll see my words to Him and His — raw and open; I try not to hide. He has been whispering to my heart this past week about mercy, and there is a backstory that I hope to share soon.
In the conversation, you'll see He speaks much more than I do, so feel free to pause while reading His words and let your heart receive them, considering your reactions and questions. Then, jump into the conversation and respond to Him as often as you'd like.
Deep breath. Here we go.
* * *
Lord, I will imagine I am writing in my journal, as I don't have it with me. But I'll type here. (Oh, my finger hurts.) I hope I have not lost my journal. It may be in the car. But you whisper to me about mercy. And I'd love to offer that — whatever you have for us — as an encounter. Will you talk to us about mercy? This gift, this character of you, is something I have taken for granted. But oh, how you are merciful. You are mercy. You are mercy. And I want to be merciful — towards myself and other people. Will you tell me what I don't know so I can understand?
“Mercy begins with love. It is the foundation. Without love, there can be no mercy. Without love, you cannot just wish for mercy and obtain it. It happens within you through my love. When my love is rejected and unreceived by you, you have no mercy to give. And some areas of your life, parts of you, have felt my mercy because you have allowed my love to penetrate you. And then there are areas of your heart that have rejected mercy and my love.
“Shame is a loud silencer of mercy, a wall you put up or hide behind because there are places you think my love should not reach. You have decided, as the judge of yourself, the administer of shame, that parts of your heart do not deserve — are not worthy–of love, and so you welcome shame instead of mercy. And shame is a dark place, an isolated place, a lonely place for you to be.”
What shall I do to identify where I welcome shame? In what parts of my heart does it exist?
“Shame is always rooted in the places of sin still uncovered, held up to the light. I forgive your sin. I forgive you. I love you. I have mercy on you. I do not want you to suffer in your shame. Sin is death. It is an icy blade that wounds you, and you welcome it, rather than my mercy, in areas where you think you know better than Me. You think you deserve pain; you deserve suffering. You feel contempt for yourself in the parts of your heart you keep from Me. I want all of you — and I don't say this because I am greedy — it is because it hurts you (and what hurts you hurts Me) not to have all of you given to me. You suffer when you withhold yourself and do not give Me all of yourself. For you are in a war for your heart, and I have come to set you free.”
Set me free, Lord. What do I do to be set free?
“Turn shame on its head–recognize it for what it is: death. And then let Me show you how you have adopted it as a family member rather than rejecting it and giving it to Me.”
I reject it. I hate it. I am sad that I have left shame to rule me — have so much control over me.
“Let shame have no footing.”
I turn to You and feel so loved when I am with You. You do not see my sin.
“No, I do not.”
You see me.
“Yes, yes, I do.”
And you love what you see.
“Yes, yes, I do.”
Shame cannot live here. I don't want it to have such control over me. Could You take it? Free me from it. Show me where it has lived — what moments have invited my heart to house it rather than turn and be loved by You.
“I will show you. Let Me give you a picture. Close your eyes.”
* * *
Close your eyes and breathe deeply for a few moments. Consecrate your imagination to God.
Lord, I give you my mind, imagination, thoughts, and ideas. Please show me a picture of where shame has gotten a hold on me. And then take it, Lord. Take it from me.
Then, spend some time contemplating the following scriptures:
Matthew 9:9-12
"As Jesus went on from there, he saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector's booth. 'Follow me,' he told him, and Matthew got up and followed him.
While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew's house, many tax collectors and sinners came and ate with him and his disciples. When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, 'Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?'
On hearing this, Jesus said, 'It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice.' For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.'" (Matthew 9: 9-12).
Psalm 23: 5-6
"You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies;
you anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord
forever" (Psalm 23: 5-6).
Psalm 103: 1-5
"Praise the Lord, my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
Praise the Lord, my soul,
and forget not all his benefits—
who forgives all your sins
and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,
who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's" (Psalm 103: 1-5).
What is God speaking to you through these verses? What does He want you to know and understand?
Write your response to God in your journal — or draw a picture of the two of you together, with Mercy there, with you, filling the space.
Amen.
