Our Desperate Chase for Love
In what ways do you regularly experience love? And in what ways do you feel like you’ve been forgotten? What are your emotional and physical responses when (1) you feel loved and (2) when you feel like no one is around, nobody cares?
“‘For the mountains may depart and the hills be removed but my steadfast love shall not depart from you, and my covenant of peace shall not be removed,’ says the Lord, who has compassion on you’” (Isaiah 54:10).
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Your Father is pursuing you. He is calling your name.
You are not forgotten. You are not falling through the cracks.
He holds you. He strengthens you. He gives you peace.
Will you join me for a few minutes now? Let’s do this:
Find a quiet place where you can be still.
It might help to put your phone on “Do Not Disturb” and set a timer (10 minutes, 20 minutes, or more).
Let your heart know it has your undivided attention–for it can be a shy thing. It needs your focus, all your energy and love now. (Below is a prayer that might help.)
Are you settled? Have you found a comfortable place to relax undisturbed?
Let’s begin by consecrating our hearts, minds, and attention to God. We can be so easily distracted. We need his help to journey with him, to notice, from deep within, His invitation to connect, listen and hear Him.
Father, I love you. I need you now. You are here. You are with me. Right here. Right now. Help me experience your presence. Help me hear your voice in my heart. I bring myself under your authority, trusting you and surrendering to you my mind and imagination, my ideas and emotions. Protect this space now–this space where I am with you. Thank you for guarding my heart. I consecrate this time of connection with you.
Next, close your eyes and breathe deeply for a few moments, feeling the air move through your nose and out through your mouth.
Abba, I belong to you.
Abba, I belong to you.
When you feel ready to move on, get out your journal and have a conversation with your Father God that focuses on the questions below. Don’t rush. Trust that He will give you the capacity to focus and the emotional strength to stay with him, discerning his voice in your heart. He is kind and good.
Father, help me to listen to what you have to say….
Father, what happens to me (emotionally) when I feel like I’ve been forgotten? How does being forgotten make me feel, and when, specifically, have I felt this way?
How does my heart beg for/crave attention? Where do I seek it first?
Why is it important to me that someone sees who I really am? Can you tell me more about this? Can you help me understand?
Who have I depended on for attention to get what I want? (Father, do I know what I want?) Will you tell me a story? Will you show me and help me understand who this person is in my life?
How vital is approval to me? Whose approval do I seek? Please explain this to me, Lord.
What counterfeits to love have a hold on me? (Whose love have I decided is the source of love for me more than the love you offer?)
Stay here as long as you can, leaning in with your heart open wide. Be expectant for his voice to speak to you. He is with you now. You are dearly, dearly loved.
When you feel like you need a break from writing in your journal, read the following verses and notice which one draws you in to pay closer attention. When you decide which one that is, read that verse over a few times, allowing yourself emotional space to listen carefully to the whispers of your heart. Spend at least five minutes reading and engaging your heart as Holy Spirit, your wise counselor, speaks specifically to you.
“But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved” “Ephesians 2:4-5).
“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him” (1 John 3:1).
“We love because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19).
“Though the mountains be shaken
and the hills be removed,
yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken
nor my covenant of peace be removed,”
says the Lord, who has compassion on you” (Isaiah 54:10).“No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:37-39).
Continue your conversation with God. How does the verse you’ve focused on provide even more clarity on the above questions you were wrestling about with Him? Write down a few sentences in your journal to help your heart process what God has been teaching you.
Finally, when I asked the Holy Spirit what He had for us, I heard the following words (which were the foundation for the exercises in this encounter): Let them cover you. Hear Him speaking to you. Keep the conversation going as long as you can.
Wanting to be loved is not a weakness. You do not need to be ashamed of how you need it. I love that you need love: I want you to need love. I want you to search for it–and I want you to find it.
When you come to me for love, you will always, always, always receive it. I do not play games with your heart. I know who you are and what you need.
Do you see all the running you do to search for love? Do you see how you have given up on it, too?
Don’t make love small. It is vast, beyond your comprehension. It is not logical. It can’t be determined by calculation or formula. To your mind, it will never make sense. But do not look for rules and formulas, strategies and lists.
Let love be wild within you. Let it loose. You have it now. Feel it, for I am here. I have no boundaries, no exit strategy. I am not fickle. My love does not change its mind about you. I am fully engrossed in my love for you.
Will you be engrossed by me?
What else captures your attention more than me, more than my love for you?
Where are you looking for love outside of me?
Come back, my love. Stay here, my love. Let me break it open within you–a stampede, a waterfall, a feast that has no end.
I celebrate my love for you. Every day, in all moments, I celebrate my love.
My love gives life. It resurrects the dead.
What is dead within you? What have you given up on?
How have you given up on Me?
Be resurrected now. Let my love do it. Raise your head. My love is here. You don’t need to look for it anywhere else but in Me.
Amen.
